MY LIFE - Barbara's blog

MY LIFE - Barbara's blog

My daughter Barbara has officially launched her blog this week. Most of us were not aware that blog building was even in progress until we became concerned after not hearing from her for several days.

"Have you talked to Barbara lately?" my other daughter Kathy asked last Friday.

"Now that you mention it, no, I haven't heard from her since last weekend." Although none of us live near each other, thanks to the wonders of modern communication we are constantly in touch. But life sometimes gets busy, so I didn't think anything more of it until two days ago when I spotted a Facebook posting from one of Barb's old friends wanting to know if everything was OK because there had been no postings from her in days. Concerned, I picked up the phone and called.

Long story short, Barbara informed me that all was well, but that she had decided to start a blog and had been fully occupied trying to get it up and running, finding a domain name (I think that's what she called it), and getting it all set up on Facebook.

Not wanting to sound like a bragging parent, but Barbara is not only an extremely talented writer, she is funny as hell. She makes me laugh out loud and on one recently embarrassing occasion at her dining room table even caused me to shoot Coke (the bottled drink) out of my nose and all over myself to the amusement of the five other people who happened to be there.

Irreverent, sometimes snarky, occasionally off-color, quick to pick up on the ridiculous in any situation, and with a sometimes slap-stick, sometimes dry wit, her observations on life are usually hilariously on the mark.

Her blog has several headings: The Daily, Overheard, Confessions, Random Thoughts, and WTF?! I know she won't mind if I give you a sampling of each, so here goes.

The Daily: "I saw an article about oversharing in the NY Times the other day and I could not agree more. They should make a public service announcement out of it. Why? Let me give you an example. Here's a typical conversation with a certain elderly relative of mine:

"Hi! How are you?"

"Well, I'm a little bit constipated."

See the problem there? I asked him how he was and he told me." And so the story goes on.

¬?

Overheard: "Jackets are for squares." "Yeah, and pneumonia is for cool people."

"Beauty is in the eye of the withholder."

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Confessions: "I'm considering getting divorced just so I can have every other weekend off and two weeks in the summer to myself."

¬?"In case of a zombie apocalypse I plan to surround myself with slower, weaker people. I'm thinking of maybe hiding out in a nursing home."

Random Thoughts: "Shana is now listed on my phone as FatAss McGee. Pretty sure I don't have to dust for prints to find the culprit." (I believe she is referring to Shana's younger sister Shelby there)

"When I'm Queen of the Universe car alarms will explode after five minutes."¬?¬?¬?¬?¬?¬?¬?

"I just found out that citizen's arrest is just for felonies. Very disappointed."

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WTF?!: "Kelly, my only female cousin, once had multiple dead animals stored in her freezer, one of which (a canary) her husband accidentally defrosted, believing it to be a chicken leg."

Anyway, you get the drift.

Best wishes to Barbara on her exciting new endeavor. If you would like to follow along you can find her at: andbythatimeanvagina.com .

Rhea Bouchard Powers is a writer from Cumberland.